Reply to Is this a normal thing for DH to say?

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[quote=Anonymous]I agree with the PP who said "normal" isn't useful here.  I also think we're missing context (the other side of the story).

Yes, marriage is a compromise, and yes, you have to make an effort to do things for your SO you might not do for yourself - the whole point of getting married is to have a mutually beneficial partnership, not a roomate.

Still, the husband's response might be totally valid, particuarly if his wife regularly has pretty OCD intense demands - for example, in the case of a neat/clean-freak married to a more slovenly person - you, as the neat/clean freak, know going in that the other person just doesn't care as much about this issue as you do - you can't expect them to change for you and take on your obsessions.

Of course, she might not be a controlling OCD-ish nag - painting a radiator/vent cover and taking down a valence don't sound quite like bitching about the dishes in the sink to me.  I dunno, DH's response has enough "bugger off" in it to suggest to me there's something going on here and this "fight" is a proxy for bigger issues.  Or he's just being a jerk; my money is on there being other issues and wife not telling us the whole story.[/quote]

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