Reply to I am dependent on H and he is starting to mistreat me

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "I am dependent on H and he is starting to mistreat me - advice?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The middle of the night examples you describe do not sound like emotional abuse. They sound like stress/exhaustion/differences in parenting. That makes me wonder about whether you are viewing his actions accurately or if they are being skewed through a lens of very protective mom / me and child against dad alignment.

Why would you lose your cool if he disagreed with something about parenting/ the child's routine/discipline?

Do you not feel he should have input? And why do you lose your cool when he voices an opinion? Do you lose your cool often?

[/quote]

These are good questions, PP.
I would lose my cool because these disagreements are sudden and not always logical. I would say, most of the time I think of them as absurd. Plus, he is doing it as "the boss of me" - not the one who participates and asks me to stick to a particular routine, but someone ordering me to do stuff. 
Let me give you some examples.
My son is afraid of public toilets. Sometimes to avoid the screaming I promise him a piece of cookie if he goes without any problem. H sees DS munching on a piece of cookie (mind you, he himself gave him whole cookies many times, often before dinner, brushing off my requests not to)  - and goes on to say that DS should not be snacking, he should only have three meals a day, etc. This shows misunderstanding of a situation, plus not being aware that I only give healthy snacks (that was actually a random treat), plus not being aware that sometimes lunchtime can be delayed (as was the case that day). 
Another example - DS loves being in a stroller. I don't take it with me for short walks to the playground, but when we need to get somewhere quickly and/or I have to carry stuff  -I do use it. H constantly tells me that I should be getting rid of the stroller.

These are just a few examples. He has a couple of pet peeves, too, but they are also about issues people disagree on all the time. It's not like I am smoking around the child or something like that that is def bad, that's what I mean. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics