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[quote=Anonymous]Op, a few things. First, the schedule your husband is working is not sustainable. You are missing out on a coparent. Your daughter is missing out on time with her father, and he is doing the same. Not only are you missing time, but more importantly, you are all missing experiences as a family.  Once your daughter develops more of a sense of self, she will need and want you both home in the evenings.  You two will need each other for moral support on a bad day, and to share in the cute things she will soon say and do.  Your husband's schedule means that none of you spend any meaningful time together which means that you won't be sharing ideas and dreams, everything from "Let's watch this tv show, or go to this event" to "I'd like to sail across the Atlantic someday". You will communicate about the running of the household, but not about what is in your hearts. My husband posted on this thread early on. He used to work your husband's hours. It nearly broke us up, and we did separate for a time. A large part of the problem was that even when he began to work a more normal schedule, we had lost the ability to talk, I had been wanting to stay home, but didn't know how to even address it. The sequester eventually got me, and that has turned out to be a good thing in terms of family and marriage happiness. Second, if you and your husband are both healthy, someone somewhere will start looking good if you two do not make each other a priority. It's why many long-distance relationships fail, people want to be with people who are physically and emotionally present. You may very well love your husband, and he may very well love you, but your comment about his secretary was very on point. If not her, someone will look good to him, and it will be someone he interacts with on a regular basis. The same will happen to you.  Lastly, you do need to make some mom friends. You and your daughter both need interaction with other humans during the day. This may be as simple as finding a moms group or it may require a move if you don't fit in in your neighborhood. We moved twice before we found our nitch. We probably could have reduced that to once had we communicated better. (see early point on the work schedule and communications breakdown). Your feelings are always valid. You need to know that. You are just as entitled to your feelings and desires as anybody. All you owe yourself, your child, your husband and the rest of the human race is that you act with integrity. You have every right to sit your husband down and tell him "This is what I need to be happy". If he can't or won't meet your needs, you do have options, painful options but options all the same. 
 [/quote]

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