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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I haven't read all the responses, but want to share my experience. Married, kids are 6 and 3. DH workaholic, known him for 11 years. With time, I understood that, although he appears very confident, he overworks because he is insecure, wants to be seen by colleagues as working hard, feels a strong need and desire to be respected and admired (which he is) by colleagues at large (not only direct colleagues but also other people 'in the industry'). He also feels quite comfortable in the work environment on comparison to home, where little battle and chaos arise all the time with the kids and, as we all know, educating and raising kids can be exhausting. So he subconsciously avoids the home environment which is the one more challenging for him. He is also a bit emotionally shut down, so when you try to reason with him about the true motives for his actions, he can't find them. 
I am not saying your DH is like this or has all these issues, but workaholics usually use work to shelter from something, somebody, or even themselves. 
We are working with a therapist, but it is going slow. He is 49, so not that young and I am very tired of this :(
Good luck. [/quote]

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