Reply to Today I forgave my husband for cheating on me...AMA

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Eek OP!! I may be [i]in the minority here[/i], but I cannot fathom why a woman would stay w/a man who penetrated another woman. I could never EVER forgive someone who would erode my trust in him on a whim like that. Basically you are now going to have [u]her[/u] sloppy seconds as well. Yuck!!  :thumbdown:

I am sorry if I sound harsh and/or judgmental, but as women, we need to be strong and stand against men who disrespect us like this. If a man was ever untrue to me, he would be history. I wouldn't take him back at all. I have too much love + respect for myself to live my life settling for less than I deserve.

OP, please re-consider what you are doing.
Have you really forgiven him?[/quote]

[b]How long have you been married and do you have children?  Your reply is pretty naive about the reality of infidelity and the nature of long term commitment.  [/quote][/b]

Sorry, but this is just a sorry excuse to me.

Just because someone has small children doesn't give her husband a free pass to cheat on her. And just because someone thinks she shouldn't stay doesn't mean they do not [b]value[/b] long term commitment.

Infidelity in a marriage is a very very [i]serious[/i] issue everyone. For a person to share his or her body in the same loving manner that is supposed to be reserved for his or her spouse is just morally wrong. I have heard the "it just happened" excuse many a times. How does a penis just slip into someone's vagina??! Or how women have to stay w/a cheating man because they have children? Since when?? We have family courts and while it is sad when families break up, it is even sadder for children to be raised in homes where one parent has been emotionally disgraced to the core.
[b]
I cannot believe someone is being criticized and judged for believing that a woman should divorce her husband because he cheated.[/b]

I say, never settle for less than you know you are worth.
And OP, deep down in your heart and soul dear, you absolutely [b]know[/b] your worth. It is much higher than you are giving yourself credit for.[/quote]

Agreed. How about the husband valuing the marriage vows, family unit, trust his wife has in him? He violated those things when he cheated- why does the wife bear the burden of forgiveness, or 'saving' the marriage or not? HE VIOLATED the marriage. NONE of this is about the wife. The marriage fails because of HIM.[/quote]

Also, would cheated-on wives like to explain to their daughters why it's okay for a man to disrespect them, and why they should do nothing?[/quote]

Oh bullshit- I've seen this upclose. If anything, seeing someone try to work through infidelity was a good learning experience as a young adult- just as the divorce was ultimately a learning experience (albeit painful as a child)- you learn that life is NOT black and white for everyone. This issues is black and white FOR YOU. Some issues you may be ambiguous about may be total dealbreakers to other marriages.

You sound naive not because you have this as a dealbreaker that has to lead to divorce. You sound naive because you can't fathom for one moment that bad (horrible) actions may not outweigh the rest of a relationship for anyone else.[/quote]

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