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[quote=Anonymous]WOW!

I sincerely hope each and every one of you is NEVER touched by infertility.  It is a sad and lonely place to be and sometimes surrogacy is the best option to having a baby and having a family. NO ONE chooses to turn to surrogacy "for fun". Each and every person who needs to use a surrogate does so b/c she (or he for Men) can't safely carry a baby.

I won't even attempt to refute all the misinformation, but nearly no one becomes a surrogate "just for the money".  The money is not all that and most of the time you'd be better off getting a part time job.  It can take YEARS for a successful transfer and delivery so in that time frame a PT job will earn you more money with no bed rest, no shots, no back pain, no issued work for appointments and no labor pain. Yes, the money is an incentive and allows a surrogate to help her family, but most surrogates feel a deep need to help people have/complete a family.

The OP is correct in that it is a FAMILY decision (although "allow" is a poor choice of word IMO).  There is bed rest and travel for transfer, increased risk of twins as many people transfer two embryos, risk of bed rest from twins singleton, wife will not be able to pull her normal household role when she is pregnant... There is SO MUCH involved - the whole family needs to be supportive of pursuing being a surrogate. We have a surrogate who was hospitalized as she was bleeding profusely. She was discharged and on bedrest for a week.  The next day her son was admitted to the hospital with asthma complications and she could not go.  Her husband was at the hospital with her son while she was at home on bed rest with their other child.  That's what they signed up for and they made it work since they agreed to pursue surrogacy as a family team- but I can't even imagine how hard it would be to not be able to go the hospitable with your young child. The money is nice, but you need to really want to help someone in order to really make it work.

(Oh... And you will not get "stuck" with the baby. It's my baby, not hers. I want it, she does not. Legally the baby will be our responsibility when it is born- she will not even be on the birth certificate which protects everyone.)

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