Reply to 17 y/o's best friend smokes pot with parents... help!

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Reply to "17 y/o's best friend smokes pot with parents... help!"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The problem isn't pot, thats a symptom.  The problem is that it sounds like your DD is depressed, and is therefore drawn to pot, as well as isolating herself.  She's not happy and thats the part you have to fix.  I don't know if she'd be willing to see a therapist, but thats probably what she needs.

Smoking pot with the father is creepy and wrong and it has to end.  You can call the father and say that what he does with his daughter is his business, but he cannot smoke pot with yours.  Seriously, there are plenty of things other kids' parents wouldn't think of doing with someone's child without asking their permission.  This should be high on the list.

Sure, everyone will be mad but if this guy thinks its OK to smoke pot with another child, he deserves what he gets.  I would call the police if he doesn't heed your warning.  But tell your daughter as well -- an adults are not supposed to do this  kind of lecture -- so that she knows that HER conduct could get them in trouble.

The fact that your daughter is not eating and is spending time alone is a concern.  And this creep should not be respected in any way shape or form.[/quote]

OP here. Thanks to you and 12:21 for the advice and concern.

I know that whatever I may think about her friend's parents, they have definitely raised an intelligent, thoughtful, kind young woman whose friendship with DD I was grateful for throughout the past year... until the pot, of course. I want to keep that in mind while I talk to them, along with my concern for DD's safety and well-being. I think she's a smart girl who knows how to handle herself, but like all teens, she's weak to peer pressure and outside influences.

You're right; if she feels better emotionally, she won't be tempted to turn to drugs and I can continue to trust her judgement. I think junior year was very hard on her both academically and socially. I have to admit, I hadn't thought of therapy, since DD has always been very sociable and emotionally well-developed. I guess I wanted to think that she was just sulking because she was upset about my rules, when in reality, I've never seen this kind of behavior from her. Even when she was feeling sad or angry (like after a fight with her boyfriend), she would talk to me and I would spend MORE time with her, not less. Where should I start looking for good therapists? I'm saddened that DD can't just tell me how she feels, but it seems like she needs someone else to talk to.
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