Reply to Grandmother to be, and visiting after birth

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Grandmother to be, and visiting after birth"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I am a first time expectant mom and I can understand your perspective, OP.  It's the perspective my own MIL probably has.  This is our first child, and the first grandchild for both sides, and I am torn on how to handle it when out of town family wants to travel here to see the baby.  My MIL will probably want to stay with us, as she always has in the past, and she will be very insulted and confused if I ask her to stay in a hotel.  I can understand that perspective--she is by herself, and staying in a hotel would seem off-putting at a time when one might think family connection and togetherness should be important.  She probably thinks she can be somewhat helpful, so why wouldn't I want her to stay in our house and help out with the baby?

But I just don't know if I want to be a host for guests, and my MIL is a demanding guest (as are my own parents).  My MIL expects to be entertained, and she doesn't really help out with anything normally.  I can see her offering to be helpful in this situation by maybe preparing meals or watching the baby, but overall I think it will be more stress for me to be a host (provide clean towels, make sure there is food in the fridge that she likes, make sure she is entertained, etc.) and I don't know if I will be up for it as a first time mom.  Having guests is stressful for me, whether it's my own parents or my MIL.  There is always the expectation to be a host and make sure they have clean towels, have food they like, etc.  And having someone who is not usually there is just stressful in general, because you can't just be yourself.  I don't really feel comfortable with my MIL, and we haven't had a very good relationship--just a distant relationship so far, and DH and I have been married over 10 years.  However, if I ask her to stay in a hotel she will be very offended and not understand at all, and I don't know if I want to deal with that and deal with her being offended.  So I'm not sure what to do.  It's a tough situation.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics