Reply to Grandmother to be, and visiting after birth

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]I have asked them how logistics will work when she goes into labor since she is not planning on being scheduled, and they gave me the names of several motels nearby. [/b]

OP again -
[b]I will indeed honor what they've asked.[/b] But I remain feeling justified in thinking [b]they are being unfair[/b], and will end up needing the help. It is very different with their generation, as my generation relied on the family during these times, and they think they can do it all.

I do know it is their choice, I just do not understand it one bit. [/quote]

OP, it sounds like you made some assumptions when you first raised the topic with them.  Also, you haven't told us exactly "what they've asked" for.   We don't know whether the motel is an issue for you because of budget, or because it feels unwelcoming, or because you expected to be on hand for them 24/7, or because you want to be able to spend more time with the new baby and sibling.  We don't know if the older sibling will be in a childcare situation or not.  We don't know what your relationship with them is like generally, or what kind of budget they have for help already, or what kind of friend network they have.

If I were you, I'd slow down and talk with them - before the baby comes, and again when you visit.  It's their job to ask for help, it's your job to say what you're willing to do or not do for them.  It's your job to ask to spend time with them and their children, it's their job to say when and how those visits would work for them.  If you stick to your roles, nobody will come off thinking anybody else is being "unfair."

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