Reply to Anyone think the stress of working isn't worth it?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  I just find working to be stressful and I find that I am often anxious and irritated when at work, and then fine at home.  I dread Mondays and love my weekends and free time.  [b]There is so much I could do with my free time if I were to stay at home.[/b]

I also think being a stay at home wife (no kids) is good too.  I did that for 2 years when we moved for my husband's job and I was unable to find work.  I loved it.  No stress.  I compare that time now with working full-time and I think I was happier when I was a stay at home wife (no kids).[/quote]

Former SAHM here. The bolded part tells me that you need to look at more options first. Look for a different job, look for ways to reduce the anxiety at work. I left my job for reasons similar to yours. I won't say I regret it exactly, but in retrospect it was a hasty and not well thought out decision.

I pictured myself having so much free time as a SAHM. Not really true. Yes I had more free time  in a sense, but also less in some ways. I could run errands during the day - but always with a baby or toddler in tow, which meant that everything took 4x as long to do. And I never even got to pee in peace. I used to fantasize about the days when I could go to the bathroom at work ALONE and take my time, and eat lunch with two hands whenever I pleased. Being a SAHM, you really just don't get to tend to your own needs a large portion of the time. When the kids get you sick, you can't just take care of yourself; you have a sick kid to care for too. It can really run you down.

I'm not sure my DH lost respect for me, but his expectations did change pretty dramatically. We talked about household duties and how we would continue to share them, but over time it became clear that even though he agreed he would/should keep doing certain things, he didn't really think he should have to since I was home all day. Never mind that he knew it was next to impossible to get all these things done during the day. It's just like how YOU think you'll be home all day and have all this free time. My DH and I both had this expectation, but it just wasn't true. I lived it firsthand and realized it wasn't true, but he didn't so he maintained all these unrealistic, unspoken expectations.

I went back to work after a couple of years and it was the absolute best thing for me. I found a new job where I learn new things all the time, I went into this job with a different mindset and really don't find it stressful at all. It actually reduces my stress. I have my own job, mental challenge, a paycheck, interesting colleagues, and can pee all alone. It's heaven.  :D now that I know we can live on one salary, I have given myself permission to spend money on things like a cleaning service that reduce my load at home and thus reduce my stress.

What have you tried to reduce your stress OTHER THAN quitting our job? How old are your kid(s)? [/quote]

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