Reply to Found Zoloft in DD's Back-pack

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

[b]I also talked to my Mom. She said the best I can do is to talk with her, find out how she is feeling, why did she feel the need for this, etc.  Then reemphasize to her that I am her father and am looking out for her best interests and that if she needs to see a doctor she needs to come see me.[/b]  I have oft repeated to DD what my father told me and my siblings growing up:  "I can fix anything but dead.  If you have a problem, your friends (or you) are drinking or doing drugs, I would rather you com to me for help than try to get it from your friends. They do not love you like I do, and they do not know everything."

Hopefully, I'll get to talk with her at length today.  Any advice how to approach this from parents who have BTDT?
[/quote]

I would suggest you get some help  yourself in the form of counseling.  You shouldn't be the age you are and have to ask your mom for exact details in how to be an engaged parent.  [b]You didn't put in the time and energy before so trying to all of a sudden swoop in and "fix" things is a terrible plan.[/b] Talk to your DD but don't expect that you are going to fix it and make it all better and prove that your DW is the problem.  Instead, suggest that you are willing to accompany your DD to a doctor and therapist and be supportive in both.  [/quote]

On the contrary OP is lucky that he can talk about such things to his own parent! How incredibly stupid to view it in a negative light! It means he has a good working relationship with his mother and that his mother is wise enough to give him good advice, not that he can't manage on his own. We are not all so blessed.

OP, I read your last post and I think all you have done is good - however I would absolutely continue to push for more honesty and fuller information from your daughter. She has not told you anything! Obviously, this is not something you can expect in the context of anger (over the loss of the retainer, for ex). Choose a time when there is no stress. Go out to her favorite restaurant or do something just the two of you that she enjoys. Give her the loving and concerned father speech (I like what your father said!). She will probably be much more forthcoming then.

As for the ped, I would make an appointment just for that issue, on the grounds that possible depression and secretiveness are major red flags for her health. This topic can't just be shoved in with the yearly physical, because it should hopefully involve a somewhat lengthy discussion so it's not polite to the ped and sends the wrong message to your daughter (that this is actually not a big deal).

Good luck.[/quote]

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