Reply to Husband upset...what should I say?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm telling you, odds are the new friend is freaking about this whole idea too.  [/quote]

+1.  Folks might be surprised. Went through this with my FIL.  Was moving really fast with a lady after MIL passed suddenly.  The 6 siblings were a united front and actually blocked him from bringing the lady to family functions soon after MIL died.  So he started giving ultimatums!  "I am not coming if my girlfriend isn't invited."  Had a minor family crisis and we happened to speak with the lady about everything.  What we learned was that the lady was actually uncomfortable with my FIL's effort to force her upon the family and she often protested to him. My FIL and his insistence that the family accept this woman on his terms WAS the issue!

With respect to the OP, I agree that you have to support DH and allow him to lead.  My DH was devasated with his mom's sudden death and had the same issues with his dad that the PP had about honoring MIL and mourning her properly. While he has come to grips with his mom's death, he has never fully gotten over his dad's behavior in the immediate aftermath. What did help him is the "life is for the living" concept.  While he has issues with everything, he did not want his dad to sit around waiting to die.  He realized his parents had a good 45 years together and that one passed on.  Deep down, he wants his dad to be happy and fulfilled.  BUT it took almost 2 years and dealing with his dad's behavior to get to that point. [/quote]

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