Reply to Do the adoptive parents "count" if/when the adopted child finds birth parent(s)?

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Reply to "Do the adoptive parents "count" if/when the adopted child finds birth parent(s)?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree with 9:50!

I am an adoptee and an adoptive parent.  All my life, I grew up thinking that there was no information about my birth parents; my adoptive parents had been told so and they had no reason to otherwise doubt the agency. (Btw, I hate using "adoptive parents"- my adoptive parents ARE my parents, but in this context, it's easier to keep differentiate.)  I never had a burning desire to find my birth parents, which was more complicated due to the fact that it was an international adoption, but once I started the adoption process for my own child using the same agency, I realized that I should try to search b/c the agency said they still had my file.

My own search hasn't been successful, so I must admit I don't know what it would be like should I ever find my bparents.  I do know that my parents were married and very poor, and they had 3 sons already.  I am a twin, and we were adopted by the same family.  Our bfather is dead and no one knows where our bmom and 2 brothers are.  One brother moved abroad.  A lot of questions were answered, though, even if I'll never meet them.  I will say that never once did I consider that my aparents were any less than my real parents.

On the other hand, as an adoptive parent myself, I do admit that I wonder how my child will feel should she ever meet her bparents.  I hope she would want to search and I will be there for her every step as she uncovers difficult details about why she was placed for adoption.  I will say that in the culture we were adopted from, it is very unlikely that her bparents would want a close relationship with her, so there's also that to contend with.

Good luck, OP!  [/quote]

I just want to say that it made me very happy to read that you and your twin were adopted together.  The story of the two local sisters who found each other at a track meet after both being adopted through foster care is fresh and that detail in your post really struck me.[/quote]

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