Reply to Husband pays for sister's vacations

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Husband pays for sister's vacations"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]OP here. I appreciate all of the responses! Some answers- my BIL makes more than my husband, but our HHI is higher because I work. SIL stopped working when she was pregnant with  #1 10 years ago because it was too hard to work and be pregnant at the same time, and she will never work again, her kids are in school full time now. I don't have an issue with that at all and I don't want to be a SAHM. I like my profession. I enjoy having her kids play with mine and think it's important to spend holidays and vacations together, so I don't have issue with that at all and my children don't know we pay for them nor do theirs. I have an issue with the guilt and whining she pulls on my husband about how they have no $$ all the time, yet she's shopping at Nordstroms and they eat out all the time, etc. She makes herself sound so destitute that my husband sends her flowers for Valentine's Day, spa treatments for Mother's Day and "just because" sometimes because it's so hard taking care of three kids. I'm sure it is, I only have two and it's hard. I have always wondered how this makes my BIL feel (who is incredibly kind). My MIL/FIL enable this too, making comments to my husband about how one income with three kids is scraping by (which I disagree). I just feel like we are supplementing their lifestyle because my husband feels guilty for the choices THEY made.

I need to focus my discussion with him not on them, but how we as a household are spending. If we are going to fund vacations for family members, we should discuss it and budget for it. I'd love to pay for my brother and his family to go on vacation with us! We as a couple need to have a joint financial strategy for our household, something we should have done before we got married. We need to have an understanding, especially at a certain $ amount like some of you have suggested.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics