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[quote=Anonymous]Wow - your husband sounds great!  (except for the drinking of course).  Not to minimize, but after all of the posts about husbands who are angry, mean, lazy, etc. - it is nice to hear about a husband who is open to talking and very nice.

My DH is VERY into wine.  We have visited vineyards as well and definitely had some nights where we would polish off 2 bottles or more when we have over friends.  For him, it is not the alcohol so much but the wine itself.  He never drinks excessively if it is okay wine.  But if it is a really good bottle (we brought back a case from our trip to Italy), he does tend to drink too much.  But it is less for the buzz and more because he loves the taste.  Before kids, I would drink with him so he didn't drink as much but after foregoing alcohol when pregnant and then nursing, I somewhat lost interest in it.

For the most part, I haven't really minded his drinking.  He doesn't drink wine every night - maybe a glass here or there during the week and then 2-3 glasses on weekend nights.  Occasionally he would finish a bottle by himself.  And he doesn't usually get drunk - he sometimes feels bad the next morning but if he doesn't mention to me, I would not notice the difference.  However, he did have one night where he drank excessively with friends and came home extremely drunk.  (His friend's fiancee had to pick them up and she dropped him off at our house).  I was really upset with him that night because I had to clean up his vomit and I did think - what if there was an emergency with the kids - he would be in no condition to help at all.

I think that event was a wake up call for him.  He had to miss a bunch of scheduled family activities the next day because he was so hung over.  We had a discussion and I pointed out he has responsibilities now and it is not like when we were young and he could just sleep in all weekend.  I didn't have to say much - he felt awful about the situation and had those same thoughts himself.  He is now very conscious of not drinking too much and limiting himself to a couple of glasses.  He realizes his tolerance is not what it used to be.

It sounds like your husband is similar except that he drinks a lot more (you said one bottle a night?).  If he loves wine the way my DH does, I think it would be difficult to go cold turkey.  (Kind of like giving up all sugar on a diet - makes you end up binging later).  So I would agree with seeing if he can just moderate himself to a couple glasses a night.  Would you be okay with that?[/quote]

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