Reply to What worked for your picky, picky, picky eater?!?

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, you asked if this is a control thing.  I would say that it is.  That doesn't mean that I think he's being a brat or acting out on purpose, but some kids feel safer when they can predict what's going to happen, which can spill over into food.  You mention that you're co-parenting, and I think that can be a source of anxiety for kids who like routine.  Maybe think about how to make sure he knows in advance where he's going to be each night, maybe a written schedule or teaching him how to use a calendar.

I do think you can build on his need to predict as far as food too.  Again, I'm the one who suggested having one thing on the table that you know he'll eat and then changing that gradually (e.g. bread instead of toast was a great example!).  I'd also think about putting together a menu so he knows what's coming up is great, having him help put it together can be even greater.  To be clear, I don't mean he gets to decide on chicken drumsticks 7 nights a week, but having you say "I bought enough chicken for 2 nights this week, which days should I serve them?" or "We can have mashed potatoes one night, would you rather have them with the pot roast on Tuesday, or with the fish on Thursday?".  You can also help him begin to anticipate challenges.  "Hmmm, we put the tacos and fruit salad on Saturday, but you've got soccer and swimming lessons that day.  I know you'll be starving at dinner.  I think that you fill up more on the chicken nights.  Could we switch Saturday and Sunday?"  You could also pick one kind of new thing each week (e.g. let's take the fruit you like, and make a smoothie), plan to serve it on a certain day, and then finish that meal by serving a dessert of his choice.  All of this helps him think about the why's of food, puts you in the ally position, and lets him anticipate so he can start thinking in advance.

I don't agree with starving a kid until they eat, but if you have no control over food at the other parent's, I really really think that won't work.  He'll simply wait you out and eat there.

Good luck![/quote]

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