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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No, the tradition is that whoever is paying - traditionally the bride's family - is hosting. They're already going out of their way to accommodate your wishes. Did you really refuse to pay for anything?[/quote]

We gave them about $1500, which my son said covers a little less than half of one of the events. But, we also had to pay to re-new our passports, buy clothing for the weekend, pay to fly across the country and into Mexico, pay for the hotel, pay for all the meals not included in the wedding. Plus our other child is out of work, and so our son is paying to fly her to Mexico and back, and we are paying for her hotel room plus for her passport and meals while there. [/quote]

You need to back off if you don't want to alienate your son and future daughter-in-law.  Ask yourself why you are creating so much drama.  Maybe it would have been nice for you to be on the invitation, but really, "humiliated"?  Your son complied with your wishes and is having a wedding instead of eloping.  Be happy.  Whatever you do don't descend into the ugliness of counting pennies.  Be joyful.  There is a reason you wanted a wedding, right?  It was to be there to celebrate your son and greet your new daugher-in-law and create a new family.  You are threatening to spoil it.  Stop worrying about petty stuff; stop looking for offence where none was intended. [/quote]

You need to back off FAST. You are putting yourself in a corner that might be very hard to get out of.

There is a new sheriff in town, and it is your DIL. She will be calling the shots, she will be the gatekeeper to your son and future grandchildren. You sound very unreasonable and quite ungrateful.

We to were going to elope and my MIL pitched a fit. I was very resentful at having to spend $30,000 of our own money on a party my MIL demanded.  Luckily for her she backed off after we agreed to a "real" wedding. If she had carried on with the antics that you are demonstrating, I probably would have bagged the whole thing and headed to Vegas.

Start to learn your place. You will get no where without diplomacy.[/quote]

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