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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm the pp you say has no friends and I have been through literally everything on your friend's terrible list plus a second child with a disability and a life threatening illness so I get it. I apologize for my tone but I also think there are better ways for you to help. I don't think suggesting more schools is helpful because a student this bright knows what schools are out there are how to research them, he just chooses not to. [b]The best thing your friend can do is call the school college guidance counselor [/b]and tell her everything in her plate and then ask them to completely take over the process. He will be more likely to listen to advice frOm a professional and this is a situation they deal with all the time.

Other things, which you may already be doing: spend a day with your friend's father so she can give herself permission to take a day away. When my mOther was dying I really needed that one day to take a break. As for her daughter, what your friend needs most, assuming her dd has good professional care, is to know she isn't alone. Gather stories of kids who have gone through depression and recovered and are doIng fine. That helped me a lot.

[b]Finally, she may be butting heads with her son because with everything going on that's the only area that feels like she can influence. But she can't. She's in a power struggle and she can't win. [/b]She's just Increasing her own stress. Passing him off to a professiOnal and letting him live with his decisions will not lead to the bottom falling out. Plus I'd he's a junior there's plenty of time. He's more likely to make sensible decisions if it isn't a power struggle. He doesn't have to decide where to apply for some time. Everyone should stop fighting him and give him room to make the right decision.[/quote]

These suggestions are helpful. But MoCo school counselors often have 100 or 200 kids on their plates. They are too busy arranging schedules for next year, changing schedules, and dealing with immediate discipline problems to help a kid choose colleges. I know, I've dealt with them about colleges. Basically, all they can do is go into listening mode rather than helping mode. Between junior and senior year OP's friend's kid will have to fill out a long packet with personal info, and this will likely to be the first time the counselors learn much about OP's friend's kid. Once in a while the counselor may suggest UMD, which is a fine school, but we got the impression that they wanted to stay out of the business of steering kids. This isn't a private school, where the counselors know each kid well and can assess fit for a wide range of schools.

Possibly the best way this could work is if one of the volunteers at the school counseling office is willing to sit down with OP's kid. Some of them are very knowledgeable and are more at liberty to spend the necessary time steering OP's friend's kid through Naviance.

I'm still not convinced OP can't step into this role. It depends if the kid trusts her, which only she can answer.[/quote]

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