Reply to 13 yo’s neuropsych results Debrief

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Other parent has Dx of autism, bipolar II, anxiety and depression. Works a lot and ignores family, is difficult to live with.

13 yo who’s exhibiting increased adhd, depression and oppositional behavior has just had second neuropsych. Last one was age 9, was told adhd.

The child also brought up fears about divorce and parents arguing a bunch. The write up won’t go over well with the other parent.

Don’t know what to do. Hand over report sprinkled with stressful home life comments, suffer the fall out? Bring them to debrief and watch the DARVO game? Will this trigger a divorce- they skip town, dump us all?

Surely the psychologist has a plan for this narcissist/ absentee parent talk… I sure don’t. [/quote]

Give Absentee parent an out - because their work is so important would they rather than you handled this long boring kid thing?  Give them the sanitized report for school if they ask (are you sure they will?). [/quote]
IMO given their DX they will come in order to deny everything and blame everyone else for whatever is going on. Could really derail the consult. [/quote] j

My experience was that my exH, who normally was a problem, when asked to appear/participate in psych consult for child, actually kept himself together because he didn't want to look bad in front of the psych.  He came to a few meetings, said only positive things about DH and left me to look like the complainer when I spoke honestly about DC's struggles (fine) and eventually made work excuses to the psych and stopped attending.  We also had a format with the psych where the parents and child would all attend together for the first and last 5-10 minutes (to report symptoms and hear treatment plan) and the rest of the time was for kid.  We've done something similar with neuropsychology - when kid was old enough we either split an hour or asked for more time - some time to explain results to everyone and then time to ask questions either together or separately.

You can absolutely ask the neuropsychologist to keep your characterizations private or to describe them in generic terms.  I told the neuropsychological evaluating DC that there was a strong paternal history of bipolar, but that I would prefer it doesn't go in the report in a way that identifies that diagnosis or ties it to a particular family member, so the report just says, "family history of mental illness".  It's also possible to ask the neuropsychological to write a report "exec summary" that keeps some private details private so that you can give to school, etc. [/quote]

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