Reply to How to tell a teen their rudeness makes it hard to want to do nice things for them?

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "How to tell a teen their rudeness makes it hard to want to do nice things for them?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Be a good role model. Stop slagging on your friends and family members who aren't in the room. No snark on your part, no sarcastic quips. No gossip. No swearing. You say please and thank you every time, too. You wait your turn very patiently in line. You're very nice to clerks and service people..If they're having trouble you say no worries, I'm not in a hurry. You be the person you are expecting your teens to be, times ten.[/quote]

This is op. You're basically describing me. This hasn't been enough.

Adding on to say that this is one reason why I don't want to model "I'm only nice to you when you're nice to me." I teach that we bring kindness and being rude doesn't make the clerk go faster or make a brusque waiter be nicer or help most situations in general. If anything, I might be modeling being a pushover and should probably be careful.

The teen rudeness generally is just at home, as far as I've observed, but who knows exactly what goes on among friends. [/quote]

I think you're overthinking.  You're not teaching them "I'll only be nice to you if you're nice to me".  You're teaching them "when you are rude or nasty to someone, they aren't going to go out of their way to be kind and helpful to you".  And that's a fine lesson to teach.  Which is exactly what you're trying to teach with your "don't be rude to the cashier, it won't make them go faster".  It's fine to teach your kid that  if they are intentionally rude and mean, they shouldn't expect kindness from others.  And if people are rude or mean to them, they have no obligation to go out of their way for them because "it's the right thing to do". [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics