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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thanks all. I appreciate the compassion and helpful pointers. Over the past 2 years I’ve tried multiple mediations and hormones and I’m still really struggling. [b]It doesn’t help that DH has no curiosity about what I’m going through. I have turned myself inside out to be cheerful for him when he comes home and for the kids. [/b]I am so overwhelmed trying to navigate the system for getting help that it feels really bleak. I feel so incredibly hopeless on bad days. I’ve been depressed before so I know what it feels like, but being married and responsible for kids and being so alone makes everything so much worse. I want to crawl into a hole. I know it sounds insane but I’m not functioning well enough to make appointments. I’ve tried multiple times over the past 3 months and each time I am met with barriers and I end up breaking down. I just want to disappear. [/quote]

The expectation that he be “curious” about your mental state and that you be “cheerful” for him, as a combo, is making you miserable.  You don’t have to be cheerful all the time.  Normal men don’t have the emotional language to talk about mental states.  You need to accept reality before you move forward.  He’s not directly responsible for being your therapist or making you feel better.  Get a therapist for that.[/quote]

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