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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m not trying to be rude here, but how do people find themselves in this situation? If you had a routine healthy pregnancy and found out that you were pregnant at the typical time, then you had many months to choose a name. You didn’t start feeling like this name wasn’t so great in all of those months?[/quote]

I’m wondering this too. Is it because you chose a trendy name? Caved to the spouse? I don’t get it. I’ve never felt this even for an instant. But we chose very classic names. I only have two kids, but even if I had needed to name 10 kids I had a list a mile long of classic names I would have been happy to name my child. My kids are teenagers now and I still love not only their names, but all the other names we considered using back then. [/quote]

DCUM is how I learned how much trouble people have with having empathy using really basic imagination. Here are a variety of ways that someone could wind up in this situation that are perfectly understandable to me:

- Their pregnancy was not "routine and healthy" -- they had complications that distracted them throughout the pregnancy and perhaps made them postpone choosing a name out of fear the baby would not make it to term.
- They had perinatal anxiety, which can be hormonally caused, and affects 15-23% of all pregnant women according to Google AI. Anxiety can disrupt your decision-making process and cause procrastination, second guessing, and difficulty in communication, all of which could impact the name selection process.
- They have PPD or PPA and it is causing them to second guess the name they chose.
- They experienced a major life event while pregnant that made the naming process harder. Death of a parent or job loss come to mind as not uncommon and likely to cause stress during pregnancy and make it harder to choose a name or potentially harder to agree on a name.
- Marital issues making the naming process fraught.
- Family issues making the naming process fraught, like an overbearing grandparent insisting on an honor name (or two grandparents competing over an honor name), a family naming tradition that doesn't feel right to the couple but they get a lot of pressure to follow, etc.

And that's off the top of my head without putting any thought into it before starting this post. I didn't have this issue with naming my kid but it's not very hard to see how people wind up with naming regret if you have even a little bit of empathy and imagination, two qualities that some folks on DCUM seem sorely lacking in.[/quote]

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