Reply to 3rd grade daughter dropped by former bestie

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Oh man I am so sorry, that is really awful for your DD and you![b] Her parents sound like real jerks to just blow you off. [/b]

My DD is also nine and this sounds like the behavior of older kids, to be honest. I'd steer your DD toward other friends. I don't think there's a good way to continue this friendship and you don't want her to learn to let people mistreat her like that![/quote]

I disagree. I stay out of my kids' drama. If L has moved on, what do you want her parents to do? Force her to be her friend? They'll probably say sorry and shrug. OP is taking this really personal, friends come and go. [/quote]

+1, if their daughter has decided she doesn't want to be friend's with OP's daughter (or doesn't want to be "best" friends), what are they going to say?

OP also sounds a little controlling. She says the other family was "disorganized" about aftercare and that OP stepped in to help them by enrolling the girls in activities and providing transportation. But what would have happened if OP had not done that? I'm guessing the other family would have figured it out. Some people are not as proactive about programming for their kids and take the path of least resistance, and if that's how they want to parent, that's fine. OP is adopting the viewpoint that the other parents were doing it wrong and OP *had* to step in and help them, but I'm betting that is not how the other family views it at all. I would bet anything that they are just more passive but figured "okay if the girls are into it and your really want to drive them around, cool." But that's very different from them actually needing, or wanting, OP's help.

OP is also not being honest with herself. She did all that because she was trying to secure a bestie for her daughter, not just out of the goodness of her heart to help another family. And now that's backfiring, as this kind of social manipulation by moms on behalf of kids often does, because kids are people with personalities and preferences and they don't just have the feelings you want because you told them to.[/quote]

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