Reply to Inability of 20yo DS to look for internships

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, how about you let him fail a bit? AND *This is crucial* let there be consequences.

No job? No money. Now is the time to let him fail when it isn't make or break.

So make sure he knows what happens if he doesn't have a job - no money to spend next year in college. Or to fill up the gas tank of the car. Or to fly to visit a GF. Or whatever. Do not bail him out. [/quote]

The problem is, he'd be fine with that. He's asocial and never spends anything or goes anywhere on his own volition. I'm not sure he'll ever meet someone and have kids. His idea of the perfect summer is lounging on the couch playing video games and generally being terminally online. He will walk the dog if I ask, or do other chores, and drive his younger sibling around if she needs it - ie, he's compliant when the request involved isn't too challenging for him - but he never takes any sort of initiative, even for things that he stands to benefit from, such as looking for an internship. He's not money-motivated at all. I guess that on top of executive function issues, there's social anxiety at interviewing and working with people. That's why I'm serious when I say I'm concerned that he's going to be failure to launch if I don't push him into a job/internship.

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I see what you're saying about the social anxiety and a sociality. But you might find he becomes more money-motivated if you cut back his spending money. Surely he wants to afford a decent phone, for example. [/quote]

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