Reply to What to Do with an Unsafe Dad?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I didn’t even get through this whole list because I am aghast and I’m a mandated reporter. How could you have let this go on this long? Why did you have 3 kids with this person?? At this point you are an enabler and complicit. I’m not a troll- I’m being straight with you here. At a certain point, you become just as guilty as he is by continuing to leave your children with him. First, document all of this as you have here. Second, get him a full psych evaluation and parenting classes. In all seriousness, if I knew who you were irl, I would have to report all of this. You need very serious intervention at this point- and I would try this before divorce because I worry there would be 50/50 custody.[/quote]

If she divorces he will get 50/50 custody and then have the kids alone 50% of the time.

OP, I agree with the others that you need to parent like a single mom. Your husband is not trustworthy to be alone with your children, at all, ever. I almost never recommend being a stay at home mom but you say he cares about his career, so would this be feasible?

You are not crazy. The things you're describing are insane, from the more dangerous, the gross. Letting kids sleep in pee sheets, what the actual f***??[/quote]

The 50/50 custody potential is very concerning and should not happen. I know a woman who only has her kids every other weekend and her ex has them the rest of the time. She claims the ex is the evil one, but I am thinking she must have done something really bad, because it is my understanding that the vast majority of cases go 50/50. I wasn’t sure if anything this husband is doing could get his children taken away from him in court, which is the only reason i would ever suggest divorce. It seems unlikely he would lose access, even with this level of negligence.[/quote]

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