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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If HE hired the private evaluator without consulting you, you absolutely do not have to agree to be interviewed or to allowing HIS evaluator to interview your children.   DO NOT participate under any circumstance.  Put your objection to this private evaluation in writing ASAP!!!

WHAT ON EARTH do you mean by “it will be awhile before we get the recommendation” ?!?
Who gives a flying f what a shill paid for by your stbx thinks is best for your kids.   [/quote]

It’s not that simple. Yes, he hired them, but yes, I also had to agree.

While legally you can refuse to participate in a custody evaluation, the consequence is typically that the opposing party will go straight to scheduling a hearing for custody. And depending on the jurisdiction, refusing to participate in an evaluation will be deemed by a judge to be non-cooperative and will impact custody outcomes. Or the judge could then appoint a court-mandated evaluator, which triggers a very different process.

You have to know your county and their expectations; mine is in a mediation-required state and focuses very much on “cooperation”, and if I had not signed off on the evaluation I would have been screwed. That’s why my STBX’s attorney deployed it as a tactic.

But…the judge does not have to accept the custody evaluator’s recommendation. It’s not legally binding, it’s just used as a tool for leverage during custody hearings. So now my focus is on ensuring that we have sufficient documentation of both the flawed evaluation process and my STbX’s actual behavior to make sure the judge has an accurate perspective to determine what is in the bests interests of our children. 
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