Reply to If your spouse ruined something by accident in the process of trying to be helpful, how would you react?

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Reply to "If your spouse ruined something by accident in the process of trying to be helpful, how would you react? "

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Context matters.

If there’s a history of them ruining my things and shrugging it off with “oops! Mistakes happen!” I’d be furious. To me that divorce-worthy.

A one time mistake and they replace the item? I’d forgive.[/quote]

This.

One off rare accident, they apologize and sensibly set to make it right? Ok work through it.

Pattern of mindless, thoughtless, careless “accidents?” Not OK. 
Followed by a Pattern of excuses, blaming others, no real apology, no real vow to do better? Way not OK. 
They need habit changes, accountability, DBT therapy. [/quote]

My ex was like this. DBT really is the answer but when I proposed that along with other shifts he lost his mind and walked out. People like this have often never been confronted with taking responsibility and often had a parent who constantly covered their tracks for them, and if you finally push back, their brains aren’t wired to handle it. Proceed with caution! [/quote]

I would proceed with caution but I would be ready for such an immature person to lie, hit the Easy Button, and walk out. That’s easier for him than self improvement, in the immediate short term only of course. Thus the bad habits behaviors and patterns will continue. [/quote]

You’re replying to me and yes, the caution I was suggesting was because like my ex, when confronted it’s easier for them to lie, bail out, etc.[/quote]

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