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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op again. I tend to over analyze when he gets like this. I wonder if it’s something I did wrong.

I also have just kind of decided not to do a lot of things I used to do. Things like doing a family holiday card and portrait. i realized none of that stuff was very important.  And everyone just humored me, with a lot of complaining from the kids.

Hosting a holiday gathering. Organizing a bunch of family holiday outings.

[b]I thought he might prefer this, because it was always me that was dragging the family to do this stuff. But now I’m not so sure. [/b]

[/quote]

You sound like you have some anxiety. I say that kindly, I do as well, so your posts resonate with me.

If he doesn't prefer it, let him step up and do it. Don't try to guess how he feels. Ask him. And then go with whatever he tells you. I have zero patience for people who say one thing but mean another. If you tell me something is ok, I will proceed accordingly. If you come back later and say well it wasn't ok I'm going to say well then next time you should be clearer, that's on you, not me.

I think you're spending way too much time in your head. Give voice to your feelings and stop guessing how people feel about stuff. I asked my kids this year if they cared about some activities because I wasn't feeling like we could do them all. Rather than trying to guess how they'd feel, I asked them. Their answers surprised me, so I'm glad I did. Now the whole family (I discussed with my husband first before talking to the kids, obviously) is aligned with our streamlined priorities. [/quote]

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