Reply to How would you react if your college DD scolded you publicly because you asked her to hang out one night?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Did she want you to come visit or did you want to visit?  The last thing I would have wanted at that age was to have my parents come to my school to spend a weekend.  And now I love to have my mom come visit and want her to meet the people in my town who matter to me.  I kind of wonder if the real problem is that she was biting her tongue about you visiting at all and then this was a straw that broke the camel’s back.

If that rings true my advice would be to tell her that you want her to be able to tell you when something doesn’t work but that this way of telling you was hurtful and that you both need to work on communication.  And then going forward I would be careful not to push an agenda.

So rather than “I’m going to come out X weekend to see your game and then you and I can visit Uncle Oldguy. Can you make sure you have that whole weekend off?”

Phrase it more like “I’d really love to see one of your games.  If I came out X or Y weekend how would you feel about that?”[/quote]

Yes, she knew I was coming. It was her final match of the season. It wasn't all weekend, it was Friday night and a train ride back Saturday morning. I flew back home Saturday afternoon.[/quote]

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