Reply to Living in a (Big?) Lie for 43 Days

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Read about something similar here on DCUM before and thought that’s crazy yet this time it’s me doing it. For 43 days I never went to work yet DW never knew or found out about it. She works too but part time so on days she worked I just slept in but made sure I left the house before she got home, and on other days when she’s home I left for nearby McDonald’s and enjoyed my morning coffee and then carried on rest of my day. Then returned home around usual time as before.

No I would not get any ‘back pay’ so next time she checks our bank accounts is when the jig is up. I have no idea what to say. Marriage might be over  practically even if she stays.

So yeah, as ridiculous as it sounds people do do this. Just thought I’d share here as a contribution to this wonderful board.[/quote]

Partner, what you’re describing here? That’s like waking up one morning, looking at your own life, and deciding to just…step off the highway and coast down the service road with the headlights off, hoping nobody notices the dust trail behind you.

Forty-three days of McDonald’s sunrises and pretend commutes? Man, that’s not just a detour, that’s a whole other road trip.

But here’s the thing: the bill always comes due. Not just the money kind, but the soul kind. And right now, you’re sitting at the table looking at a tab you don’t really wanna pick up.

You’re scared your marriage might be over. I hear that. But brother, the only way you get through this...the only way...is by taking all that fear, all that shame, all that secret-McMuffin energy, and walking up to her with the truth. Not the polished truth. Not the “here’s how I spin this so I look a little better” truth. The real, messy, human truth. The kind that comes from deep in the chest.

You tell her what happened. Why it happened. What you’ve been holding inside that made you sit in that booth for forty-three mornings instead of asking for help. And then you stand there. You breathe. You wait.

She might cry. She might yell. She might need time. But you give her honesty now, and you at least give your marriage a chance to be built on something sturdier than a Filet-O-Fish and a lie.

And hey, life’s not over, man. You hit a wall. Happens to a lot more folks than you think. What matters is how you walk back from it.

So dust yourself off, partner. Time to take the wheel again.[/quote]

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