Reply to Need private school ASAP for ADHD 5yo — eloping, dysregulated, needs active learning

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Reply to "Need private school ASAP for ADHD 5yo — eloping, dysregulated, needs active learning"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=theflash1985][quote=Anonymous]Your kid is violent and has a history of elopement.  It isn't easy to find a placement for a child with those behaviors.  That's why I suggested that you talk with your advocate about identifying your options.  I've been down this road and know just how long and hard it is.  [/quote]

Is your kid thriving now? What school worked for them?[/quote]

My kid is now in college and successful.  What worked is this.  Lot's of collaboration with the school.  Lot's of forgiveness when they screwed up and lots of forgiveness when I didn't get things right on my end, which like it or not effects school success.  Recognition on both parts that so much was trying things to see what worked and walking away from those that didn't without judgment for the person who may have suggested it.  Recognition that even when they agree to do something, people call out and emergencies happen - because some days my kid was the emergency and was the cause of someone else's kid not getting their services that day.  More IEP changes than you can imagine because what we thought would work one day didn't the next.  Hospitalizations.  Residential treatment.  School suspensions that required mental health clearance to return to school after violent episodes and elopements.  Eventually a non mainstream public placement, which seriously was unbelievably amazing.  But it took years and failures to get there and lots of work to identify the right one.  That placement happened in HS and surprisingly, both ES and MS staff participated in helping us secure a spot in the program.

I hear my spouse in you and recognize the emotions.  Managing my spouse was its own issue.  In the end, all school and education related issues were solely in my lane.  My spouse's personality, which came across as combative at school, was amazing in their work life, but did not lend to success when it came to getting my kid an education.

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