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Reply to "Would you get a neuropsych?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No harm in getting one if it's an affordable option, and might give you some info that could help moving forward. If you get a diagnosis, could also give you better options with getting her support at school.

However I would like to echo a PP suggesting looking into other schooling options. Some kids just do not do well in a traditional classroom environment. She may be a more tactile learner or the kind of kid who needs reinforcement via multiple methods (reading it, hearing it, seeing it illustrated) to really commit knowledge like geography or months of the year to memory.

Even if you can't change schools, you might look into other educational approaches for how you support at home. It is really frustrating that the school is defaulting to these apps for everything, but also so common. In our house, we ignore the app homework often in favor of more hands on learning activities (using stacking blocks for math, encouraging physical writing for reading comprehension because the act of writing helps actually commit the information to memory and promotes understanding). Supporting in this way has done more to help our DD develop academically than if we'd just done what her public school teachers recommended and made sure she did extra iReady lessons at home.

[b]Always remember you know your child best and while you can't ignore the advice and feedback of teachers, you get to choose how to interpret it and what to do with it. A teacher saying "she'll always be at the bottom" is a piece of information, but I wouldn't just acquiesce to it. She may just have academic needs that a typical classroom cannot meet. Many kids who get written off early in school have far more potential than their teachers ever imagined.[/quote]

I can offer a long-term perspective that might be of some help and reassurance.  My daughter is the the youngest of three siblings.  My older two, both boys, cruised through our highly-regarded MCPS elementary school, but our daughter struggled, especially in math.  When she was in third grade at the same school, her teacher was very concerned about her progress, especially in math.  At the urging of both the teacher and the principal, we got a complete neuropsych evaluation, which told us pretty much what you've heard from your daughter's teacher:  "She'll always have to work hard and will probably still be at the bottom."

My husband and I decided to move our daughter to a small, nurturing PKK-8 private school, where she started in second grade.  We had been considering the move anyway because of the mean girl dynamic in her grade.  At the new school she found encouraging and creative teachers.  She made wonderful friends.  She blossomed academically and socially.  We moved her to another private school for HS.  She continued to do well both in and out of the classroom.  She wasn't an academic star like her older brothers, but she developed great study and time management skills and, most important, grew in confidence.  It also helped that she was a strong athlete, so she had an area in her life where she truly excelled, and she had a wonderful experience as a Girl Scout.

She's now a senior in college.  She is majoring in psychology and continues to play her sport.  She also was an admissions tour guide and a tutor for elementary school children.  Last summer she had a great internship on a Senate campaign.  The staff member who supervised her told her that he'd hire her in a minute if she wanted a job on the senator's staff and would recommend her for any other job.  She is now a finalist for a study abroad fellowship.  So, the neuropsych report was correct in concluding that she'd have to work hard, but completely wrong about where she'd end up.  Cue A Chorus Line: "It's not where you start, it's where you finish."

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