Reply to Caring for a declining parent

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hire a once a week aid for 3 or 4 hours (most agencies have a 3 or 4 hour minimum) .

When the aid comes in call them a cleaning lady (to father),

Let MIL drive off for the 3 or 4 hours so she gets a real break.

Tell her she can drive off and go to the spa, get her hair done, go to the mall etc.[/quote]

Can I make a request that you not say this? People mean well but “go to a spa” is so insulting. She’s probably going to go to the dentist, to which she’s overdue. Or cry alone in a parking lot. Or go to target and buy stuff they need. The idea that 3-4 hours of respite care is so amazing and restorative to a caregiver that they’ll “go to a spa” is so out of touch with their reality that it borders on cruel. [/quote]

Well Step mom is doing this to herself, by refusing to even consider putting her husband in a facility. 
If you don't like the solutions others are offering, then you suck it up, stop complaining and deal with it (she's doesn't need to but if she's refusing to do the logical thing, well that's on her)
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