Reply to I respect Bruce Willis' wife for having him receive 24/7 care in separate home

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My concern is him not understanding where he now is, where his family is, being confused, feeling abandoned, getting depressed. [/quote]

He likely does not know who they are anymore, but can enjoy their visits. With my own parent they sense emotion, but don't know who you are. So if you visit and are happy and loving, the person with dementia catches the mood. If you are exhausted and losing it (which I saw happening even with 24-7 care, because caregivers need time in their own home without a constant stream of strangers) the person with dementia senses the frustration and can become stressed.[/quote]

This 100%. The other PP is projecting their own normal healthy way of thinking onto an FTD patient. They don't know where they are, who their family is, nothing is ever familiar, but it doesn't matter because most of the time they don't have any expectations either. There is no sense of abandonment because there is no sense of where they used to be or who they used to be with.

And no one should criticize caregivers without being in their shoes 24/7. Dealing with an adult with dementia is so hard. It's like a toddler but worse because it's a full size body. My dad would do stuff like pick up a knife from the kitchen and wave it around in ways that made me uncomfortable. We locked up all the sharp objects that night, but like another PP said, seniors don't have the best executive function even when they don't have dementia. My mom was never as careful about safety as I wanted her to be.

Memory care was necessary, and it will use up all their savings. Bruce Willis' family is lucky that they can afford any and every level of care. Given that amount of wealth, we would do the same for my dad - private second home with 24/7 care or a high end nursing home with 24/7 supplemental aides.[/quote]

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