Reply to mom called from nursing home--asking to come come

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[quote=Anonymous]My condolences OP.  This is so common, and white lies are really the only answer.

In my mom's memory care, she doesn't have a phone (she doesn't know how to use one anymore). So the incessant calls I got when she was mid stage stopped. But now, whenever I come visit, she is fine until I am leaving, and then wants to leave with me, and cries or says "I can't believe you are leaving me here..." and it's really hard. I just tell her I will be back soon (truth, but vague). I also know that she is actually doing well there--like I will show up and one of the staff is painting her nails, or she is dancing to the oldies (to the extent she can dance with her walker) so I think she's fine when I'm not there. But there are moments where she really has no idea where she is and thinks we all still live together in a house with my dad (they've been divorced 30 years and she's forgotten husband number 2!) and she doesn't know why I am not taking her home. Its distressing to both of us. [/quote]

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