Reply to Spouse avoiding discussions about RIFs and next steps

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]“Listen, I know you are stressed about this job situation. It totally sucks and it isn’t your fault. But I need you to think through some options that might make sense for us logistically and financially. It is really hard for me to listen to you discuss things like selling art or being a DJ. That is something we should totally consider once we have enough saved for retirement and college and the kids are launched. But right now, I think you need to look at what jobs are out there with a steady paycheck and health benefits.”[/quote]

I would not like to be talked to that way with the multiple "you need to" statements.

I personally would prefer more along the lines of "how can I help you navigate this?"[/quote]

Fair enough that you can change the language a bit, but I’m personally not mollycoddling my husband and entertaining some “maybe I can be a DJ nonsense.” And I’m a wife that makes 75-90% of our income each year and carries the health insurance. I’m fine with that, but my husband has a legitimate business in which he has expertise. If he came to me tomorrow with some “I want to work for the circus nonsense”, I would probably just laugh and be like “nope.”[/quote]

If push comes to shove, there's nothing you can do to make him act. Your scolding will just make him dig in his heels. You're going to divorce a guy who go laid off? Great idea, have fun paying him big bucks in spousal and child support.
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