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General Parenting Discussion
Reply to "International travel with a needy kid"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Does anyone do international travel with sensitive kids who always seem to need you? Like exploring big European cities or roadtripping between cute villages, doing some museums, historical sites, good food, etc? We're on a big trip like this now and I'm wondering what is normal and what others' experiences are like. We do our best to keep to a routine when traveling - we're very strict with bedtime and separate sleeping spaces to ensure good sleep, we talk through everything we're going to do, try to bring little activities to keep them occupied, etc. We also make time to go to playgrounds, avoid fancy restaurant with long waits, always do the kid activities in the museums, etc. [b]Something we struggle with is keeping our little one not bored[/b] -- she is just not good at entertaining herself (too young to read, doesn't like drawing, etc), and when she is bored she acts out. Carrots and sticks ("You'll get ice cream after the museum") don't work. So I feel like either I have to do hours of screentime each day or constantly entertain her, which can get really tiring if we're together morning to night. I wonder if there's some way to get kids to self-entertain while traveling without screentime, or if it's normal for them to constantly need attention at the table, in the car, in a museum, etc.[/quote] Given that this is all written in the singular, with no mention of another child, my strong suspicion is that you're in the habit of constantly entertaining her (or being responsible for her entertainment) throughout the course of daily life. Entertaining yourself, and managing your emotions when you're bored, are both skills, and they way you build them is to let the kids be bored. It happens a bit more naturally when you have multiple kids (because - sometimes the other kid needs you and one has to just, be bored and whine and figure it out), but it's something you can cultivate in your daily routine. Obviously if you're currently on a trip, or one is happening next week, this isn't useful advice. But I would get in the habit of a standard 30 minute "me time" or independent playtime, with a timer, each day. Kid plays in her room by herself. You're in the house, and obviously within earshot for emergencies, but otherwise you don't go in her room, and she is not allowed to come out. She will whine and cry at first, but when she realizes you mean business, she'll figure out something to do. And you'll reap those rewards the next time you're traveling. [/quote] It's much easier for young children to entertain themselves at home, with their toys, then while traveling. What would you expect them to do while at the 5th cathedral of the trip when mom is tired of talking to you?[/quote] Agreed. My not yet 3 year old is great at independent play at home or even at the beach but would not be able to do that in a museum or other adult activities. [/quote]
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