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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My parents are generally kind people but growing up I often felt a dismissive attitude, like I had to be a certain way to accommodate and please everyone or else I was meant to feel annoying and bad.

Ds and dd both went to them for a week (abroad as part of a big trip, firs trip there without us in years), now ds is with friends elsewhere. He had a great time at my parents’. And now dd is spending more time there alone this summer and she is having the same exact experience I had growing up. My dad is especially bad around strangers and will put dd down to please them or to apologize for what he perceives as rude (like dd politely refusing to try a spread at a store), agreeing dd has a big accent when she speaks. I’m upset. I feel bad about her having this bad experience and it’s bringing back bad memories of my own teen years. My brother could do no wrong, now ds can do no wrong.[/quote]

Your DD is not you. This is a summer experience for her while it was your childhood. Talk to her about it.  She most likely will be dealing with this in a different way vs how you feel.

It’s like going to your IL’s house. Your spouse has issues from their childhood with their parents while you do not. [/quote]

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