Reply to Does getting married mean you just slowly lose yourself until there's nothing left?

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[quote=Anonymous]I relate you so much op. My kids are now older. Just want to echo everyone else. Spend your money. It’s okay to overspend right now, you need it.

Nanny, Housecleaners, lawn people, only grocery delivery or hello fresh/cook unity, etc

Get out of the house. You have to. At least take a grown up class 2-3x per week. Join a super supportive gym, or yoga, or dance, anything to get your body moving and be in a community of people.

Get on birth control. If you don’t want to have sex with your husband bc he won’t get a vasectomy, don’t. Tell him why.

Get in couples counseling.

Journal everything.

You are not his servant. You have power - you can stop having sex, stop cleaning except for the rooms that you and the kids use, take them out all day to places you like (target, nature centers, pool, etc), make new friends, work on your body. Write. Update your resume, dream about that awesome job you get.

It gets so much better, you’re literally in the worst season. Only uphill from here. [/quote]

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