Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Parenting -- Special Concerns
Reply to "Moving south and hesitant to adopt a different race- advice?"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here- Thanks for the frank replies. I especially appreciate the advice to speak with other adoptive parents in Richmond. There are a variety of reasons why we are choosing a southern city (family, etc). Just know it's not something we are flexing on. It is very important to us to expose any adopted child of a different race to his/her background. I'm not comfortable "white washing" the situation and if we had an AA child would want to be involved in an AA church, have AA role models and friends etc. I don't think it would be easy in a city like Richmond. Question: do you think it would be just as challenging with a Latina child in the south? I just assumed it would be less of an issue, but am honestly ignorant about that scenario. Thx! Appreciate responses, especially from those who have lived in southern cities! [/quote] AA parent here. I am going to be frank. Do you have any black or hispanic friends where you live now? Do you have any affinity for or ease with blacks or latinos? If so, you should ask those friends what they think. If you have no black or latino friends, you should ask yourself why that is the case? If you don't have black friends now, and you try to make them simply because you adopt a black child, you are going to come off like a fake. Believe me, I know several white APs with black children who aggressively try to befriend me to fill that black friend/role model position. I simply don't understand why people who were heretofore completely comfortable in an all white world, took no notice of or interest in forming relationships with black people before would bother to adopt a black child. It reeks of "I wanted a baby, so I took what was available, and now I am clueless." And sorry if I offend you, but I have a real problem with adoptive parents who insist on requesting only a girl. In international adoption, it is one of the leading drivers of corruption. Adotpion is supposed to be finding a family for children in need, not filling orders for adoptive parents. And no, I am not anti-adoption. I am an adoptive parent and an adult adoptee.[/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics