Reply to Why do people blame their siblings over parental favoritism? What is the appropriate response?

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[quote=Anonymous]Well, it’s easier to be easier when your parents are lavishing you in all kinds of attention or privileges, KWIM? You may not have known it, as you were the oldest and such a good everything (according to you).

We all grow up with different parents, even though they’re the same parents. They possibly help your sister with “things” but they still might not treat her as an equal to you.

You can’t necessarily fix it, but you could maybe validate her feelings and maybe make it a little more open and acceptable to talk about how you each feel.

So many families have weird dynamics. In mine, it’s the middle (half)brother who is the golden child- he basically replaced my twin, who died at 6mo. I was the horrible reminder, he was the replacement, and my youngest brother was too much like his father. For me, it’s not his fault, and I feel bad for the years of codependency he experienced although he doesn’t see it that way. I’m close with the youngest brother but will always include middle brother.

Get therapy for yourself if you can, because having family relationships so fractured can change us. I know you don’t see it, but it’s changing those relationships now. As your parents age, it’s going to become even more complicated with helping with their care.

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