Reply to MIL move in to memory care next week- advised to lie to her

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm so on the fence about the not visiting for a week.   As someone who had to leave my dad in a rehab a few times, I can't imagine not visiting for a week (though mentally he was still mostly there).

As a medical provider, I do get why they may feel family coming and going may be disruptive to them settling in.  Unfortunately I see it all the time in patients in the hospital with Alzheimer's and other memory issues where their behavior ramps up after family leaves for the day.  Now usually we invite a family member to stay in that situation to keep them calm instead of banning them, but I get that's not doable in a nursing home setting.  Can you talk to the facility more about the no visits?   I can see why having your FIL not visit may be a good idea, but maybe having another family member would be ok.   I really hate the idea of no one being able to check on her for an entire week.

therapeutic lying is weird and I think if you haven't had to experience it, you don't get why it's so needed.   The conversations I've had with patients where I just play into their world is wild.  I once stood with a patient at his window and had a 15 min conversation about the movie John Travolta was filming outside (there was nothing but an alley with a dumpster).  But in the end he took the meds I needed him to take and got ready for bed and I had an entertaining break from work so .win win.   [/quote]

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