Reply to Divorce and college costs

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Kinda curious but you guys each have $12K extra you can put towards college but haven't been saving anything all along?  Even like $3K each per year?

Also, I think you have to evaluate what you are able and willing to pay outside of whatever your ex is paying and then present that number to your child (or let your kid discuss what schools they want to attend with their dad and come up with a plan to fund attendance).[/quote]

The 529 did not seem to be very tax advantageous to us to we prioritized retirement and other savings and investments. It’s not that we have no money. We also came into our higher salaries only in the last several years, especially myself. 
Child support will be over as soon as kid graduates HS.[/quote]

If he’s paying child support and you are receiving it he may not have had the same ability to save as you for retirement and other things especially if incomes are only recently high.  And, he may be paying other expenses on top of child support.  You act like he’s a deadbeat.  He’s paying child support and offering $12k for college.  Your child goes to a state school which is what we tell ours.  If you pick an expensive private, you pay the difference.  [/quote]

He is paying the state mandated minimum which does not cover even close to what the actual costs have been. So in addition to actually taking care of the kids, I cover the rest. I know he has had plenty to put into retirement and brokerages because he brags about his account balances.

I know there are people much worse off. This isn’t the victimhood Olympics. What’s maddening is that he talks big about T20s and SLACs and then prioritizes himself when it comes to the money and thinks I should pay, even though I have not been able to save as much as he has because I am living in DMV and he has spent much of his time living in company housing for free.
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