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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Marriage counseling. Does it work?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Didn't help us with communication issues. Spouse think everything goes back to their childhood, and I'm like JFC, you are an adult, you make your own choices now and need to stop blaming mom and dad. And while my childhood wasn't perfect (is anyone's?), I don't have any deep trauma buried somewhere, and spouse has a hard time believing this. We've tried a couple of different times over the years, 3 times, over 26 years, 3 different therapists. It has not worked to improve our communication[/quote] Yeahhh... you're one of those. Even if you think "I'm an adult, I have moved on" guess what — your entire communication and relationship style and everything right down to why you chose your spouse is related to your family of origin. If you haven't examined this, processed it, and made changes, then you are the problem in your relationship. You don't need to have capital T Trauma to understand basic human psychology. Being part of a functional healthy relationship means you examine yourself and your behavior and motives deeply. Sounds like you're only ever interested in turning the page and staying comfortable.[/quote]
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