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Reply to "Does anyone else feel that trying g to be a nice person has not benefited them?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There’s a difference between being kind and being a doormat. You can be kind and still set boundaries with people. [/quote] Yes, this. But also, my motivation for being kind is not to benefit myself. That’s a weird way of looking at it. The point is to do what’s right, be a good person, and help others. Putting others before yourself is key in many religions, but you don’t need to be religious to do it. [/quote] Being kind and being good often have different motivations. Kindnesses are often done quietly and can be more intrinsically motivated, while doing good is often more public and extrinsically motivated—even the term “do-gooding” suggests it can be performative at times. If you’re at the point of resentment, listen to yourself, and see if focusing on kindness rather than being/doing good helps. [/quote]
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