Reply to Monogamy is over rated -from a married mother of three children perspective

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[quote=Anonymous]As a single mom by choice, I listen to my married friends very reasonably muse over statements like this, and I’m always a little mystified. We all have to make choices OP. With the frequency of marriage failures specifically related to infidelity, I chose not to get married. I lived through what it did to my parent’s marriage and decided that was not for me. Motherhood however, was very important, so I chose that pathway, and I’ve accepted the challenges that accompany my choice. I have to make every decision on my own, I have to earn all the money, I have to help my child navigate the world with one parent. And she’s doing amazingly well. And yes, I also get to have private relationships on my own time. I don’t have a two parent household, I don’t have the social status that accompanies being married, I don’t have anybody to bounce decisions off of in my household. Those are the things you have. And no, you don’t also get to have a boyfriend.

I really appreciate that this is a very normal thing you’re struggling with, but I have to tell you that it feels fairly immature and myopic. You don’t get to have it all. You chose the married route, and yes, that comes with the limitations that it comes with. Open up the emergency and see how that goes, but as a poster upthread pointed out, it doesn’t work. It’s simply not compatible with the childrearing stage of life.[/quote]

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