Reply to I told my daughter a prom dress looked unflattering on her... mistake or no?

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Reply to "I told my daughter a prom dress looked unflattering on her... mistake or no?"

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[quote=Anonymous]You have to be careful when offering criticisms to teenage girls.  Often, their self esteem can be very fragile.

You don't have to nod or smile the entire time, but think what a good shop keeper might do - you flatter while gently guiding.  You offer suggestions and ask questions.  So something like, hmm, it's ok, but I do like the blue one much better.  Or even and hmm, I don't know, there's something not as fun about that one, maybe?  Or, what do you think? This one isn't speaking to me as much.

(that said, sometimes the shopkeeper/salesperson can get away with a more direct approach - it's easier hearing from someone you know is speaking objectively).

It's not the kid, or her body, it's the dress.  Saying something isn't flattering is perhaps about the dress and not the body, but it's still a little too direct.  Offering something besides it's not flattering might hve helped - even saying sometimes dresses are great on the hanger but they just don't hang the way you want them to - this one just isn't working as well as the one before.

Or offering some positive - that open neckline on the first relaly framed your face - maybe we should look at ones more like that?

Only you know your relatonship with your daughter and how she responds.  It sounds like she wanted kinder and gentler from you.

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