Reply to Guilt tripping the “good” daughter

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She has dementia.  don't take the guiit trips personally.  Easier said than done.[/quote]
This is the answer OP, work on how you receive negative remarks. Every time your mom is critical remind yourself that it’s the dementia, and thank yourself. Think about who else you might be able to reach out to for support or a break. [/quote]

These guilting was always there but it was more subtle. So I’ve been guilted for 40 years.[/quote]
Ok, that is hard. Do you want someone to tell you that it’s ok to stop caring for her? It seems like you are missing the key fact that she has a dementia. My father was terrible, this would be a very long comment if I listed 1/100th of the abuse and the damage it caused. But now he has dementia. He’s not responsible for his actions in the present and there isn’t going to be a resolution of the past, except the resolution I make for myself. You need to figure out what you are willing to do in spite of the past and knowing she isn’t able to change her behavior now. That isn’t the question you asked, but it seems to be the question you actually have.

It’s a difficult situation OP, I feel for you.[/quote]

Not OP, but you missed the part where she doesn't guilt-trip the sister, so this must early enough dementia that she has some responsibility for her behavior and ability to alter it based on who will put up with it.[/quote]

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