Reply to How do you deal with a spouse who undermines your parenting every step of the way?

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Reply to "How do you deal with a spouse who undermines your parenting every step of the way?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would argue with my husband.  You have an obligation to make sure your kid is raised well.  If that means I disagree with my spouse then so be it.

My husband and I parent slightly different but we believe the same basic things.  Kids need chores and responsibility, kids need consequences.

Ideally you should have investigated your husband's values before you married him.  I do have an adult cousin who hated his mom for having so many rules when his dad did not.  He said his mom was not cool.

As an adult he thanks his mom.  Weirdly he raises his kids the way his mom raised him, not his dad. Loving but not overly permissive.[/quote]

It’s not even about the chores so much as the undermining. I have a pretty terrible relationship with my exDH but I learned to step back and not undermine him when he was disciplining or working with DC on something, even if I disagreed. I only intervened when they started to dysregulate. Even now I try very hard not to put myself in the middle. Partly because I have a big rule against fighting in front of DC if avoidable. partly because I don’t think I actually have all the answers in terms of how to parent. [/quote]

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