Reply to Ex forcing son to attend events with new partner

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]That's not unreasonable that he spend the time with his dad if his dad is supporting him after 18.  You can always pay for college yourself or he can pay if he doesn't want a relationship.  Simple.[/quote]

He's obligated to pay by our divorce degree. We both pay child support to son in proportion to our income, child support is legally till age 21 in my state. The issue is that dad threatens not to follow the legal agreements if son is not doing what he wants him to do. If exH doesn't prepay tuition for next semester, I would end up in court collecting it.

I am actually the one financially interested here in their good relationship and who insisted on 50/50 time split on college breaks. I'm dating, too and need some time for myself. Grown up kids are expensive and child support is minimal.

[b]But I feel like a shitty mother for "selling" my son to the person he doesn't want to have anything in common. I am thinking long term: exH is much older, he will be gone in 20 years or so. Our son is a sole heir and in trusts of a multi-mullion estate. [/b][/quote]

There is a reason you feel that way, OP. You know full well that your son could spend the next 20 years in misery with his dad dangling this multi-million dollars in front of him and still not leave him a penny. Some things are more important than money. I know you need some time to yourself but he is literally at college. I feel bad for your son. It sounds like neither parent has his best interests at heart.[/quote]

I do have my son's best interests in heart. I even moved closer to his college town to take him to therapies. It's completely insensitive to impose that lady on son, under threats to discontinue support or kick him out from the house where my son grew up.

This is returning to the topic whether women should allow exHs to keep the marital houses! I deeply regret I allowed this, and didn't force sale. Having dinner at the same room where mom was cooking/entertaining guests is traumatizing.

I will see how their conversation goes this evening, but I'm leaning now to offer son to spend Christmas with me because his mom and his grandmother are the only people who love him. I do have a BF but I wont' even think of imposing him on my son![/quote]

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